True Mercy

True Mercy

What is mercy, really? Is it dismissing the sins or offenses others have committed against you? Is it overlooking things another does that hurt you or cause you to stumble? Are you really being merciful when you grit your teeth and pray for patience when a friend or loved one does something that truly offends you?

I hope to provide an answer to these questions, and it just may surprise you. The answer lies in two of my favorite scriptures. The first James 2:13b:

Mercy triumphs over judgment.

Some versions use the words rejoice against instead of triumphs over, but the meaning of the Greek word, katakauchaomai is "to boast" of one's victory over an opponent. Picture a triumphant warrior standing with his foot upon the chest of his fallen foe. So great is God's love for us that no matter how severe the judgment against us, mercy will almost always stand in its place. So, mercy means to just decide that no matter what a person does, it's OK, right?

Wrong.

First, look again at James 2:13. It says mercy triumphs over judgment. That means there has to be a judgment to begin with, or else mercy has nothing to triumph over. For mercy to "boast" over judgment there has to be a determination of the nature of the sin and the guilt of the sinner. I'm not just talking about sin against God. I'm referring to those offenses by others that we each are confronted with every day. Mercy shines brightest when it covers those judged most guilty and deserving of punishment. The second passage, John 8:2-11 illustrates my point perfectly:

Now early in the morning He came again into the temple, and all the people came to Him; and He sat down and taught them. Then the scribes and Pharisees brought to Him a woman caught in adultery. And when they had set her in the midst, they said to Him, "Teacher, this woman was caught in adultery, in the very act. "Now Moses, in the law, commanded us that such should be stoned. But what do You say?" This they said, testing Him, that they might have something of which to accuse Him. But Jesus stooped down and wrote on the ground with His finger, as though He did not hear. So when they continued asking Him, He raised Himself up and said to them, "He who is without sin among you, let him throw a stone at her first." And again He stooped down and wrote on the ground. Then those who heard it, being convicted by their conscience, went out one by one, beginning with the oldest even to the last. And Jesus was left alone, and the woman standing in the midst. When Jesus had raised Himself up and saw no one but the woman, He said to her, "Woman, where are those accusers of yours? Has no one condemned you?" She said, "No one, Lord." And Jesus said to her, "Neither do I condemn you; go and sin no more."

It's common today to downplay this woman's sin by guessing that she may have been in an unhappy marriage, or that she really loved the man she was committing adultery with. Some have taught on this passage with such a focus on the woman as a victim that they miss the true message. Mercy triumphs over judgment.

There was no doubt whatsoever that the woman was guilty. She had been caught in the act, and according to the Law deserved death (Lev. 20:10). Because it was the scribes and Pharisees who brought her before Jesus, she may have already been tried before the priests and condemned to death. Yes, she was being used to try to trap Jesus, but that doesn't lesson the severity of her own sin. Jesus knew she was guilty. She knew it as well. I think all that was left for her to cling to was the hope that a silent prayer for mercy would be answered. It was.

But, the woman had to wait a few moments. Jesus needed to show mercy to her accusers first. He did something very odd under the circumstances. He started writing in the dirt. There has been a lot of speculation about what He was writing. My personal belief is that He was writing down the laws the woman's accusers were themselves guilty of breaking or perhaps He even wrote down the specific sins of each accuser. I base this on what happens next.

He raised Himself up and said to them, "He who is without sin among you, let him throw a stone at her first."

Then he went back to writing on the ground, and the crowd, convicted by their conscience, dispersed. Mercy triumphs over judgment. He could have confronted them with their own sins, openly, accusingly. He could have revealed all the secret things each of them had done, exposing their shame for all those present to see. But He didn't. He had mercy on those who were without mercy. Not only did they not ask for mercy, they probably didn't think they needed any. That is the nature of mercy: it doesn't limit itself to those who deserve it. If it did, it wouldn't be mercy. Jesus knew that mercy begets mercy. When you are shown mercy, you are more likely to show it to others.

Next, Jesus dealt with the issue of the woman's sin:

He said to her, "Woman, where are those accusers of yours? Has no one condemned you?" She said, "No one, Lord." And Jesus said to her, "Neither do I condemn you; go and sin no more."

Notice Jesus did not say "That's ok, you didn't mean it". He didn't trivialize or dismiss the sin. In fact He made a point of it by saying "Go and sin no more". The woman knew the full gravity of her own sin. Jesus knew that she knew. So, not only did His mercy save her from judgment, it empowered her to turn from her sin. That is another way true mercy triumphs over judgment. It empowers those to whom mercy is shown to turn from whatever actions required judgment to begin with. That is why just saying, "it's ok" is sometimes not being merciful.

When someone offends you or hurts you, it's not really being merciful to just dismiss it and say "That's OK" when in fact it's not OK. Often, we don't address the offense, and it festers. You think, I'm being forgiving and merciful by not making a point of this. Sometimes this is true. What often happens, though, is the offense lingers in the back of your mind. Then, if the person hurts you again, you are even more offended by the second act because of the lingering hurt from the first offense.

I know most everyone has been in this situation: you had hurt someone in the past, and it seemed to be resolved because they just said, "It's ok, don't worry about it". Then, you do something similar and find yourself the brunt of some horrendous accusation about how you always do this to the person. Then you are hurt because you realize that person has been holding the old offense against you all this time. A conflict ensues that leads to even more hurt feelings, and before long a relationship is destroyed, or at least severely damaged.

The fullness of mercy is expressed when the offended party tells the guilty party just how hurtful the offense was, and the guilty party accepts that. Next time someone hurts you, don't just blow it off by saying "that's ok". Tell them you are hurt, and why. Not in an accusatory manner, but in a loving way in order to avoid any conflict and restore a spirit of unity between you and the other person. This also helps the other person to avoid repeating the offense. In a sense, you owe it to the other person to let them know they have done something to hurt you, if for no other reason so they can understand how to avoid doing so again.

Now, about this time, you may be thinking, "Wait a second. Aren't you talking about judging another person?" No, I'm not. Matthew 7:1-2 does indeed warn us about judging others. But Jesus is talking not about the person's actions, but about the motives of their heart. Only God knows the reason why a person does something. We can, and should, judge whether someone's actions are sinful. But, we are not to try to base our opinion of the person's worth on what they do. Like the saying goes "Hate the sin but love the sinner".

Misunderstanding passages like Matthew 7:1-2 leads to counterfeit mercy. People engulfed in sin insist that if you really love them, you will accept what they do. Christians, not wanting to be "judgmental" never confront sinful behavior. God says just the opposite. Christ hung broken and bleeding on the Cross to prove that true love and mercy refuse to accept the sin in a person's life. Just like with the woman in John 8, mercy says "Go and sin no more". To take the attitude that sin against God or offenses against people is no big deal trivializes the Cross. Jesus' death was God's way of saying that it is a big deal. It's not OK. So much so that God gave His only Son to pay for all our sins, releasing us from condemnation so that we all can "go and sin no more." Mercy triumphs over judgment.

So many believers have fallen into the trap of counterfeit mercy that they no longer take sin seriously. As a result, they no longer appreciate the mercy God has shown them. This leads to them being less able to show mercy toward others. "…with the measure you use, it will be measured back to you" (Mt. 7:2). Two things then happen. Either they become judgmental and unmerciful towards others, or they downplay offenses, mistaking indifference for mercy. Both attitudes can cause great harm to befall both that person and others. True mercy is so powerful specifically because it doesn't trivialize offenses, but instead overcomes them through love.